journey to solitude

Gosaikunda and back again (Part I)

Once in a while we tend to forget who we are. We get so entangled with life that we forget to live; we are lost in nowhere. Its not only the story of me. Everyone somewhere in time have these feeling being drowned where there is no water.  They ofter take a journey to find themself. Discover themself. Some are able to find themself during this journey. Some lost themself completely. This is not a story. Not fairytail. Its my experience. Its not about me. Its about an idea and thinking. Its not motivational. Its not inspirational. This is just a small fraction of what I can express about a journey I undertook on May , 2016.

So it begins. I always wanted to travel alone. Maybe you might think I am too inspired or wanted to copy “Into the Wild”. But believe me it is not another version of “Into the Wild”. This is my sole attempt to live nearer to nature. To feel it, to listen it, to embrace it. Though the idea of travelling to Gosaikunda struck right after our trip to Upper mustang but only on April 28th , I was certain about my trip to Gosaikunda.  Having given my tent to Bivek bhai, I asked Ayam to lend his. He happily accepted to buy necessary items from Bhatbhateni supermarket. That was 29th April, 2016, that old murky trekking bag was gained from Tara didi. At first sight of trekking bag, I thought I would never accept that lousy bag. But I was forced within as I had no other choice.

On friday evening 29th April @ Verisk, Hattisar (Conversational Version of above paragraph)

“Lets go shopping for tomorrow.” – me

“Shopping? Where are you going” – Ayam

“I am not sure. I think, I will go to Gosaikunda tomorrow morning.” – me

“Also, can you please lend me your tent. I have given my tent to Bibek.” – me

“Sure. You can take it while returing home from shopping” – Ayam

We both went shopping to Bhatbhateni, Naxal. I bought all the goods that I had on notes. With all the vital trekking item spread across my king size bed, I started to prioritize the item in order to fill the rug sack. I had filled the rug sack and still only a small narration of my adventures to Mustang has been completed for Ansu. She was as excited as I was to tell her what happened at Mesokanta Pass. It was already 10 pm, when all my narration was completed. All my night, I only imagined what it would be like travelling alone. All by myself.

Saturday early morning.

I woke up at 4:30 am and completed my morning routines. It was disrespectful to lie to Aama about I was going all by myself. But fearing they would not allow, I told a lie that I am going with a friend. Moreover, when Aama asked to write my friends number on her sketch pad, I carefully without any intension to hurt her feelings wrote my own ncell number. There was exchange of last safe journey words.

(Conversational Version of above paragraph)

“How many of you are going” – Aama

“Only two of us.” – me (I lied in someway [ Though we are two indirectly. One me and other unknown power calling me])

“Write down the number of the other guy going with you.” – Aama

“Ok.” – me

“Safe Journey. Do call when there is network” – Aama

“Sure” – me

Sleeping bag in one hand. Tent in another. A huge rugsack bag on back. With a rugsack filled to its extreme capacity, tent in one hand and baggy pants, it felt like I am going somewhere far towards nature, to happiness and to satisfaction. People would stare me like I am some foreigner as I took a bus from Jaybageshowri to New Buspark. After arrival to Buspark, I was informed that bus to Dhunche was only available from next stop. Worried, I walked with full pace to another stop. I don’t know but with every action I did, some fear crept in that I will not be able to reach Gosaikunda. I just had Rs.400 left with me at that point of time. I relentlessly searched for ATM nearby. But couldn’t find a functional ATM. Meanwhile, probably a college student with his weary looks, was also roaming with same pursuit. Then I became a bit relaxed. He called for me and said that we are in luck. Yes, we were. The ATM of “Sanima Bank” was functional. He went first. Then I went second. I cashed out seven thousand rupees from the ATM and thought it would be enough for the trip.

At first, I spent the money on Sunglasses. Then bought few capsules of medicines for altitude sickness. I could see many tourists around the busstop. I wondered if all of them were going to the same destination as I was. I found one tourist was struggling to buy fruits from the shop. I went by his side and asked If he needed any assistance. He replied “yes”. Then had few exchange of sentences. Few minutes after, the bus of which I had tickets has arrived.

Then my phone start to ring. It was from unknown number.

“Hello !”

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